57. A Devotee Should be ‘Jati and Sati’ (Chaste) | Way of Living


“Characteristics of a Jati”

Purush yati (jati) so janiye, nij triya tak vichaar |
Mata behan putri sakal aur jag ki naar ||

Meaning: - That man is called Yati who apart from his wife does not have the feeling of husband and wife with any other woman. According to the age of the other woman, he should regard her as a mother, sister or daughter.

“Characteristics of a Sati Woman”

Stri so jo pativrat dharm dharae, nij pati dewat joye ||
Anya purush sab jagat mein, pita bhraat sut hoye ||
Apne pati ki agya mein rahae, nij tan man se lag ||
Piya vipreet na kachhu karae, ta triya ko bad bhaag ||

Meaning: - That woman is called a Sati who has attachment with her husband. Apart from her husband, she should look upon i.e. treat other men of the world according to their age as a father, brother and son. She should remain in the order of her husband. She should serve her husband with her body and mind, and should not do anything against the wishes of her husband.

“How important it is to do charity”

Kabir, manokaamna bihaay ke, harsh sahit karey daan |
Taka tan man nirmal hoye, hoye paap ki haan ||

Kabir, yagya daan bin Guru ke, nish din mala fer |
Nishfal vah karni sakal, Satguru bhaakhae ter ||

Pratham Guru se poochhiye, keejae kaaj bahor |
So sukhdayak hot hai, mitae jeev ka khor ||

Meaning: - Supreme God Kabir Ji has told that a donation that is given without any desire gives both the fruits. The task will get accomplished in the current life as well as virtues will be accumulated for future, and a donation that is given for the fulfilment of a desire finishes after the accomplishment of the task. A donation that is given without any fulfilment of a desire purifies one’s soul and destroys one’s sins. 

First, acquire a Guru. Then according to the order of the Gurudev ji, one should give donation. Without a guru, no matter how much donation you give and how much naam (mantra) you recite, everything is a futile effort. The Satguru says this repeatedly.
First, take permission of the Guru, and then do your new work. That work will lead to prosperity and it will remove all the tensions of the mind.

Kabir, abhyaagat aagam nirakhi, aadar maan samet |
Bhojan chaajan, bit yatha, sadaa kaal jo det ||

Meaning: - If a guest comes to your house, then as per your financial situation, you should always respectfully give food and bedding.

Soyi mlechchh sam jaaniye, grahi jo daan viheen |
Yahi kaaran nit daan karey, jo nar chatur Praveen ||

Meaning: - A householder who does not do charity is a ‘Malechchh’, that is, he is like an evil person. Therefore, O wise person! Always do charity.

Paatr kupaatr vichaar ke tab deejae taahi daan |
Deta leta sukh lah ant hoye nahin haan ||

Meaning: - One should not give donation to a wrong person. One should happily give donation to the right person who is worthy of receiving donation. Gurudev has been described as the right recipient. Then one should give food to someone who is starving. If one has to provide medical treatment to a sick person, then one should himself/herself pay the money for the treatment. Making a group of victims of a flood or drought, one should distribute food and clothes with one’s own hands. This is described as giving donation to the right recipient. There is no harm in this.

Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 179

Kabir, fal kaaran sewa karae, nishdin yaachae Ram |
Kah Kabir sewa nahin, jo chahae chaugune daam ||

Meaning: - One who does worship for the accomplishment of one’s task and keeps asking for something day and night from God; Supreme God Kabir Ji has stated that, that service is not service if one wishes for four times the wealth in return of the service.

Kabir, sajjan sagey kutumb hitu, jo koyi dwaarae aav |
Kabahu niradar na kijiye, raakhae sab ka bhaav ||

Meaning: - If gentlemen, relatives, family members and well-wishers come to your door, then never disrespect them. You should respect everyone.

Kabir, kodi-kodi Jodi kar keeney laakh karor |
Paisa ek na sang chalae, ketey daam bator ||

Meaning: - One did not spend any money on charity and meritorious deeds, and accumulated millions and billions of rupees. While leaving this world, not even a single penny will go with you, no matter how much wealth you accumulate. 

Jo dhan Harike het, dharm raah nahin lagaat |
So dhan chor labaar gah, dhar chhati par laat ||

Meaning: - The money, that is not spent towards God, never gets spent in meritorious deeds, is snatched by dacoits, thieves, and robbers by (dhar chhati par laat) frightening and threatening the person who owns it.  

Sat ka sauda jo karae, dambh chhal chhidr tyaagae |
Apne bhaag ka dhan lahae, pardhan vish sam laagae ||

Meaning: - One should perform all deeds in one’s life based on truth with the fear of God. One should feel contented with the wealth scripted in one’s destiny. Consider someone else’s wealth as poison.

Bhookha jahi ghar te firae, taako laagae paap |
Bhookhon bhojan det hain, kataen koti santaap ||

Meaning: - One incurs sin if someone leaves hungry from his/her house. Crores of obstacles are removed of those who give food to the hungry.

Pratham sant ko jeemiye, peechhe bhojan bhog |
Aise paap ko taaliye, katey nitya ka rog ||

Meaning: - If a saint (devotee) comes to one’s house, then one should first feed the saint and later have food oneself. In this way, one should avert the suffering of the sins incurred daily from one’s head.

Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 180: 

Kabir, yadyapi uttam karm kari, rahae rahit abhimaan |
Sadhu dekhi sir naavte, karte aadar maan ||

Meaning: - Relinquishing arrogance, one should perform excellent deeds. On seeing a saint, devotee coming ahead, one should greet and respect them by bowing down.

Kabir, baar-baar nij shravante, suney jo dharm puraan |
Komal chit udaar nit, hinsa rahit bakhaan ||

Meaning: - A devotee should repeatedly listen to Satsang-knowledge on the topic of meritorious deeds and one should be soft-hearted. Non-violence is the supreme religion. One should listen to such sermons related to non-violence.

Kabir, nyaay dharmyukt karm sab karaen, na karna kabahu anyaay |
Jo anyaayi purush hain, bandhe yampur jaayein ||

Meaning: - One should always perform fair deeds. One should never do injustice. Those, who deliver injustice, go to hell in Yamraj’s Lok.

Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 181:

Kabir, grah kaaran mein paap bahu, nit laagae sun loye |
Taahite daan avashya hai, door taahite hoye ||

Kabir, chakki chaunkae choolah mein, jhaadu aru jalpaan |
Grah aashrami ko nitya yeh, paap paanchae vidhi jaan ||

Meaning: - A householder incurs sins in five ways: in grinding flour in a flour mill, by lighting fire in the stove for cooking food, while plastering the floor with cow dung, while sweeping floor with a broomstick and in eating and drinking. O Worldly People! Listen! You incur sins daily due to these reasons. Therefore, it is imperative to do charity. These sins will only be destroyed through charity.

Kabir, kachhu katein satsang te, kachhu naam ke jaap |
Kachhu Sant ke darshte, kachhu daan prataap ||

Meaning: - Sins of a devotee are eliminated through many religious rituals: some through Yagya of Knowledge by listening to words of Satsang, some by recitation of mantra, some by having a sight of the saint, and some are eliminated by the effect of charity.

            Like we wear clothes. They get dirty by getting stained with mud/dirt. They are washed with soap and water. Similarly, it is natural to incur sins during the daily chores. Just like clothes, by daily washing with the soap and water of words of Satsang, recitation of mantra, charity and audience of the Saint, a soul remains clean. One’s mind remains engrossed in Bhakti.

Kabir, jo dhan paay na dharm karat, naahin sad vyauhaar |
So Prabhu ke chor hain, firte maaro maar ||

Meaning: - The wealth that God has given to man, from it those who do not donate money and neither have a good conduct, they are thieves of God who wander here and there in the obsession of accumulating money. Saint Garibdas ji has also stated that: -

Jin har ki chori kari aur gaye Ram gun bhool |
Te vidhna baagul kiye, rahey oordh mukh jhool ||

This very evidence is also mentioned in Gita Chapter 3 Verse 10 to 13 that those who do not perform meritorious deeds, who do not do charity from the wealth given by God, they are thieves. They only cook food to nurture their bodies. They do not spend it in meritorious deeds; they eat sin alone.

Children Must Be Educated

Kabir, maat pita so shatru hain, baal padaavae naahin |
Hansan mein bagula yatha, tatha anpad so pandit maahin ||

Meaning: - Those parents who do not educate their children are the enemies of their children. An illiterate person among educated people is like a heron among swans. Here the importance of providing education is to imparting spiritual knowledge, listening to Satsangs etc.

If someone does not have spiritual knowledge, then he/she is unable to know about good and bad deeds. Due to which, one keeps committing sins. Those, who listen to Satsang, become aware of all the deeds and spirituality. That person never commits sin. He/she is like a swan, who only eats pearls from the lake, and does not eat living beings, fish etc. Contrary to this, a person who does not have spiritual knowledge has the nature like that of a heron. A heron eats aquatic creatures like fishes, insects, worms etc. Both (swan and heron) are of the same shape and white complexion. One cannot differentiate them on looking at them. One finds out from their actions. Likewise, a person who has Tatvgyan (true spiritual knowledge) is identified by the auspicious deeds and a person devoid of Tatvgyan is identified by inauspicious deeds.

Kabir, pehle apne dharm ko, bhali bhaanti sikhlaay |
Anya dharm ki seekh suni, bhatki baal buddhi jay ||

Meaning: - First, one should make one’s children and other family members attain full knowledge of one’s own religion. Those who do not know about their own religion i.e. religious practices have an intellect like that of a child. On hearing the teachings of the other religion, they go astray. He who has complete knowledge of one’s religion (sect) does not get misled.

            Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 182:

Kabir, jo kachhu dhan ka laabh ho, shuddh kamaayi keen |
Ta dhan ke dashvein ansh ko, apne Guru ko deen ||
Dasvan ansh Guru ko deejae | apna janm safal kar leejae ||

Meaning: - The tenth part of the earning from a noble income should be donated to one’s Gurudev.

Kabir, je Guru nikat nivaas karae, to sewa kar nitya |
Jo kachhu door basae, pal-pal dhyaan se hit ||

Meaning: - If the place of the Guru ji is near your residence, then go daily to serve him. If it is far away, then you should remember him every moment. This leads to wellbeing of the worshipper, that is, he/she attains benefit.

Kabir, chhatey maas Guru darsh karan te, kabahu naa chuko hans |
Guru darsh aru satsang, vichaar so udhrae jaat hai vansh ||

Kabir, chhatey maas na kari sakey, varsh mein karo dhaay |
Varsh mein darsh nahin karey, so bhakt saakit thahraaye ||

Kabir, jae Guru parlok gaman karey, seekh maaniyo sheesh |
Hardam Guru ko saath jaani, sumro nit Jagdish ||

Kabir, Guru maraa mat jaaniyo, vastra tyaaga sthool |
Sukshm dehi gaman kari, khila amar vah phool ||

Kabir, Satlok mein baithi kar, Guru nirkhae tohey |
Guru taj na aur maaniyo, adhyatm haani hoye ||

Kabir, Guru ke shishya ki, Jagdish karae sahaay |
Naam japae aru daan dharm mein, kabahu na alsaay ||

Kabir, jaise ravi aakash se, sabke saath rahaay |
Ushnta aru prakaash ko, doorahi te pahunchaay ||

Kabir, aise Guru jahan basey, sab par karey rajaa |
Guru sameep jaankar, sakal vikaar karat lajaa ||

Meaning: - One should certainly go once in six months to have a sight of Guru ji. The entire clan attains salvation by the satsang and sight of Guru. If one cannot go to see Guru ji once in six months, then one should go with great excitement in a year. If one does not go in a year to see Guru ji, then that disciple is considered to be devoid of bhakti.

            If the Guru ji has gone to Satlok, then continue performing your religious or meritorious deeds based on his teachings. Considering your Guru ji to be with you every moment, you should worship the Supreme God. You should keep reciting the initiation-mantras given by the Guru ji.

            Do not consider your Guru ji to be dead. He has only abandoned this material body just as clothes are taken off, but the body remains intact. Similarly, the cloth of material body has been abandoned. He has gone to Satlok with his effulgent body. He has attained immortality there. He is waiting for you. You have to go too. Without dying (relinquishing the material body), one cannot go to Satyalok. Even the disciples have to abandon this material body. So, instead of mourning on Guruji’s relinquishment of his body, perform the way of worship advised by him, and make your life successful by following the rules.

            Gurudev is watching you while sitting in Satlok. After the departure of the Guru ji from the world, you should not look upon anyone else in the form of Guru; otherwise, your Bhakti will be destroyed.

            Supreme God helps the initiated disciple of Guru ji. A disciple should never be lazy in reciting the mantra given by Guru ji and in performing charity and meritorious deeds as advised by Guru ji.

            Like the sun provides heat and light to everyone from far away in the sky, and appears to be with everyone. Similarly, wherever Guruji is sitting, he showers his grace on his devotees from there itself. Considering Guruji to be near you and watching you, feel shy and refrain from committing any wrongdoings.

            Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 183: 

Kabir, ketey jankaadik grahi jo nij dharm praveen |
Paayo shubhgati aap hi aaurnahu mati deen ||

Meaning: - Householder like King Janak was a scholar of his religion, that is, he was well-versed with the deeds that should be performed by human beings. Due to which, he himself also attained an auspicious salvation, that is, went to heaven, and also showed the path of attaining heaven to others.  

Kabir, Hari ke het na det, dhan det kumarg maahin |
Aise anyayi adham, baandhe yampur jaahin ||

Meaning: - Those people who do not perform meritorious deeds and misuse the money – drink alcohol, eat meat, consume tobacco, or spend it in futile ostentations, such unjust, mean people are shackled and taken to Yam’s place i.e. to hell.

“What should be the behaviour of a devotee like?”

Nijdhan ke bhaagi jetey sagey bandhu parivaar |
Jaisa jaako bhaag hai deejae dharm sambhaar ||

Meaning: - Supreme God Kabir Ji has stated that whoever are the legal heirs of the property, one should give their full part to them keeping one’s religious code of conduct in mind, that is, a devotee with the fear of God should fully distribute whatever others deserve among them.

            Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 184:

Kabir, khaat padae tab jhakhayi naynan aavae neer |
Yatan tab kachhu banae nahin, tanu vyaap mrityu peer ||

Meaning: - On becoming old or sick, when a person is lying on the bed and tears are shedding from his eyes, at that time, he cannot be saved. He experiences the pain that occurs at the time of death. It is said that those who do not do bhakti, their end is extremely miserable. They do not die easily. One experiences so much pain as if one lakh scorpions are stinging him. At that time, the messengers of Yam choke his throat. The person is neither able to speak nor take a full breath. Only tears shed from the eyes. Therefore, a human being should certainly perform the bhakti and the auspicious deeds mentioned above.  

Kabir, dekhe jab yam dootan ko, it ut keev lukaay |
Maha bhayankar bhesh lakhi, bhaybheet ho jay ||

Meaning: - The messengers of Yam have a horrible appearance. At the time of death, the messengers of Yam become visible to only that person who is devoid of bhakti. On seeing them, that soul tries to hide here and there inside the body itself.

Kabir, bhakti daan kiya nahin, ab rah kaas ki ot |
Maar peet praan nikaalahin, jam todenge honth ||

Meaning: - Neither acquired a Guru, nor did bhakti, nor performed any charity or meritorious deeds; now who will save you? The messengers of Yam will beat you and take the soul out. They will hit you without any consideration, that is, they will ruthlessly beat you badly and smash your lips. They will smash lips means they will beat ruthlessly.

            In Dharm Bodh Page 185-186 there is general knowledge.

            Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 187:

Kabir, maan apmaan sam kar jaanae, tajae jagat ki aash |
Chaah rahit sansya rahit, harsh shok nahin taas ||

Meaning: - If someone insults a devotee, he/she should not pay attention to it. Have mercy on that person’s intellect. And if someone praises, do not pay any attention to that too, that is, because of respect given by someone, do not spoil your righteousness. Considering gain-loss to be the gift of God, remain contented.

Kabir, maarg chalae adho gati, chaar haath maahin dekh |
Par tariya par dhan na chaahae, samajh dharm ke lekh ||

Meaning: - A devotee while walking should keep the gaze down. A devotee’s gaze while walking should remain at a distance of ‘four hands’ i.e. 6 feet ahead. Reflecting on the knowledge of religious code of conduct, on seeing other’s woman and other’s wealth, one should not corrupt one’s mind.

Kabir, paatr kupaatr vichaar kar, bhiksha daan jo let |
Neech akarmi soom ka, daan maha duHkh det ||

Meaning: - A Saint i.e. Guru should not accept donation from anyone other than his disciple. Money of a malefactor and sinful person causes excessive grief.

            There is general knowledge on Page 188.

            Dharm Bodh, on Page 189:

Kabir, indri tatv prakriti se, aatm jaan paar |
Jaap ek pal nahin chhootae, toot na paavae taar ||

Meaning: - Consider the soul to be separate from the five elements. The body is not the soul. Continuously recite the Satnaam.

Kabir, jab jap kari ke thak gaye, hari yash gaavey sant |
Kae jin dharm puraan padey, aiso dharm siddhant ||

Meaning: - If a devotee becomes tired while reciting mantra, then one should read the speech of the magnificence of God. If one remembers it, then one can sing it, or one should read the holy books of one’s religion. This is the religious principle.

            Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 190: 

Kabir, gyani rogi artharthi jigyaasu ye chaar |
So sab hi Hari dhyaavate gyani utre paar ||

Meaning: - Four types of people do bhakti of God: -

Gyani (Knowledgeable): - A Gyani becomes confident that a human life is only attained to get the welfare of the soul done by doing bhakti of God. They also understand this, that salvation is possible only by the bhakti of One Complete God. The suffering of birth and death cannot be eliminated by the worship of other gods-goddesses. One will only succeed by taking initiation from a Complete Satguru. Therefore, (Gyani) knowledgeable devotees attain salvation.
Artharthi: - Those who only do bhakti to obtain wealth. 
Aart i.e. afflicted with miseries: - Those who only do bhakti for the removal of their miseries.
Jigyasu: - Jigyasu incompletely understand the knowledge of God, and in the greed for fame become an orator, and destroy their lives. This same evidence is also given in Gita Chapter 7 Verse 16-17.

Summary of Dharm Bodh Page 191: 

Kabir, kshma samaan na tap, sukh nahin santosh samaan |
Trishna samaan nahin byaadhi koyi, dharm na daya samaan ||

Meaning: - Supreme God Kabir Ji has stated that to forgive someone is a great penance. There is no penance like this. There is no happiness equivalent to contentment. There is no catastrophe equivalent to the desire to obtain an object, and there is no meritorious deed equivalent to kindness.

Kabir, yog (bhakti) ke ang paanch hain, sanyam manan ekaant |
Vishay tyaag naam ratan, hoye moksh nishchint ||

Meaning: - There are four important facets of bhakti. Sanyam, that is, one should practice restraint in every work. Practice restraint in accumulating money, in speech, in eating and drinking, in sensual pleasures, that is, a devotee should speak less and relinquish sensual vices. It is imperative to worship God and ruminate on the speech and sermons of God. By worshipping like this and following the rules, one certainly attains salvation.

Complete God even increases the age of a devotee: -

It has been mentioned in Rigved Mandal 10 Sukt 161 Mantra 2 that the Complete God cures the illness of his devotee. Even if the sick person does not have any life left, and he is going near the God of Death, then God by making him/her healthy, grants an age of hundred years. He increases his/her life. Read the evidence from “Kabir Sagar”, Chapter “Garud Bodh”